Friday, October 30, 2009

Ranking the Sports Months

Below are, from worst to first, my favorite months of the year for sports. (And therefore, from first to worst, the months Lindsey and I have the least fights.)

12) July - Hands down, the worst sports month. All there is to watch is baseball. Well, and the Hot Dog Eating Contest. Linds and I do great in July.

11) August - Football's in sniffing distance, but baseball's still the only game in town. Bump August ahead of June if your team's still in the pennant race. But I root for the Mets, so that's not usually an issue.

10) June - Gets the slight edge over August thanks to the NBA Finals, which have been pretty fun the last few years. And don't forget the Scripps Spelling Bee.

9) April - The home stretch for NBA hoops, and -- for this month, at least -- I'm excited there's a Mets game on every night. Lindsey doesn't share my sentiments.

8) May - An underrated month, thanks to some great playoff basketball. TNT boasts of airing "40 Games in 40 Nights", and boy, do they mean it.

7) February - Starts with the Super Bowl, but then it's off to depression-city. NBA, great college basketball, and the Westminster Dog Show help. But let's face it, this is the month girlfriends start slapping each other five under the dinner table. Football's gone 'til September.

6) January - The big bowl games, and the NFL playoffs. But remember, playoffs means teams are eliminated. And when teams are eliminated, that means less football.

5) October - Football's in full swing, but the novelty of September's worn off a bit, and you realize that during the week, there's not that much to watch. If May is underrated, October's a bit overrated.

4) March - I know what you're thinking: This is high for a non-football month. But it's March Madness. And March Madness is the best event in sports. Looking for a good time to fake sick? FVG recommends the third Thursday and Friday in March. Actually, even if you really get sick, it's still probably worth it.

3) September - The month that makes girlfriends everywhere cringe. FOOTBALL'S BACK!!! The pure joy of it is what makes it so great. Like if someone's been dangling a cupcake in front of your face and then finally lets you take a bite. As Homer Simpson would say, "Mmmmm, Septemberrrr...."

2) December - The NFL plays more games this month than any other, as it adds Saturday to the docket. But that's done to compensate for an inexplicable lack of college football. (I know, I know. There's an explanation: Players are studying for finals.) Sure they are.

1) November - Now you see the point of this post?! We're entering the best sports month of the year! NBA and college hoops kick off, college football has its most exciting month of games, and the NFL adds Thursday to the lineup, which includes the year's greatest holiday. It began in 1609, when a group of Pilgrim men decided their wives had become too overbearing since they arrived in the New World. So they declared the final Thursday in November a day of uninterrupted eating and football.

They called it 'Thanksgiving'.

Saturday Picks

West Virginia (-3)
@ South Florida (Friday 8:00 ET). This line seems low, but don't overthink. USF's looked horrible the last two weeks.

Syracuse (+15.5)
vs. Cincinnati (12:00 ET). I smell an upset here (or at least a close game). Not sure why.

Georgia (+15) vs. Florida (3:30 ET, in Jacksonville). A HUGE spread for the World's Largest Cocktail Party That I Can't Believe I've Never Been To. Florida might be 15 points better this year, but that's too many points for a game like this.

Texas (-9.5) @ Oklahoma St (8:00 ET). I know it's in Stillwater, but Mack Brown's 11-0 in this series, and the 'Pokes are missing key players on offense.

Oregon (+3) vs. USC (8:00 ET). I'm excited to see the scene in Eugene before the game starts -- they've been waiting all year for this. Hopefully I'll still be excited when it ends.

Last Week: 3-1-1
Record to Date: 14-14-3